Why I stopped caring about numbers when it comes to being creative.
There's always a number that will make you feel bad about yourself.
I’m going to put it out there. I never check the numbers on my blog.
As in, I never look at or put any thought or energy into how many people are reading it, how to get more people to read it or whether enough people are reading it.
Rewinding a bit, I remember being obsessed with numbers back in Instagram’s heyday, where I’d preoccupy myself with likes, followers, comments and more.
The thing is, the world runs on numbers — and often involves cheesing numbers or misrepresenting stats to make things look more impressive than they are. I worked in a big media company for 7 years in a very competitive industry. I’ve seen exactly how businesses spin the figures to turn them in their favour.
Social media likes and follower counts are a recipe for a disastrous mental health journey. In the 2021 baroque-pop album OK Human by American rock group Weezer, lead singer Rivers Cuomo makes a surprisingly simple statement in the song titled Numbers.
There's always a number that'll make you feel bad about yourself
You try to measure up, try to measure up to somebody else
Numbers are out to get you, numbers are out to get you
I spent the better part of a decade obsessing over numbers. How many likes did this post get? How many views did this YouTube video get?
When I started this blog, I made a promise to myself:
That I wouldn’t let numbers stop me from writing.
I wouldn’t get caught up in the whirl of, “Well, no one is reading, so why should I write?”
Because that’s not what this project was about.
Starting this blog was a space where I gave myself permission to write again. I loved writing during school, but barely did it after I graduated from university. I was one of the kids who loved writing essays, especially text-response English essays where you have to unpack the meaning behind Ernest Hemingway’s books or an old movie you had to watch in English class.
What I realise now, is that the numbers are actually kind of irrelevant.
If you’re creating for the sake of being creative, having an audience is a welcome addition, but not the only factor that motivates you.
I know for a fact that a lot of people stop persisting with making content online because they don’t feel like it’s working for them. They don’t see the numbers they want right away, and it disheartens them. So they quit.
The thing is, you will never feel like the numbers you’re getting are high enough.
Ever.
I reached about 250,000 views on YouTube in April, but it still didn’t feel like enough.
That’s why I decided to stop caring about numbers, and start caring about consistently making content that I’m proud of.
That is the only way to liberate yourself from the confines of numbers. The numbers will always disappoint you and they will always make you feel like quitting.
I noticed that the less I cared about numbers, the more my numbers have seemed to grow. Maybe it’s a coincidence. Some kind of osmosis or sign from the universe.
Or maybe I’m just assigning less emotional value to the numbers than I have in the past.
In my early 20s, an Instagram post that didn’t get enough likes would drive me crazy. It would cause me to feel severely depressed and defective. Like nobody liked me.
Isn’t it unbelievable that these apps can control our moods that much?
That they can completely warp our sense of worth and reality over a few people double tapping?
So, if you read my blogs… thank you! Every now and then on Substack’s dashboard I see a quick glimpse of the numbers, and yes, there are people reading. But I’m never going to care about these numbers or give them time or space inside my mind.
Your creative muscle and integrity is too valuable to waste scrutinising numbers.
Invest that time and energy into the process and you will be rewarded a million times over.
Mike Liberale
Resonance: A weekly snapshot of stuff I liked this week.
🎮 A video game I’m OBSESSED with: Balatro
🎥 A movie I watched: Wild with Reece Witherspoon.
📖 A book I read: Almost Transparent Blue by Ryū Murakami
💿 An album I liked: Bloodflowers by The Cure.
📰 An article I found fascinating: Snapchat is harming children at an industrial rate from AfterBabel.com
Great as always, Mike. It's very true and something anyone involved in any creative endeavour will have to untangle at some point. I always remember this thing called 'Goodhart's Law' which is that (my understanding at least): as soon as a measure is considered important, it ceases to be useful 😅